Shingles were my Christmas gift to my-self & although extremely painful, they were also beautifully freeing. The past few months have really been a time of realisations & stepping out of patterns that aren’t in harmony for me anymore & I guess the time had arrived for my body to also do its part. As soon as the shingles appeared, I could almost hear my body saying ‘Great, she’s down, let’s make the most of it’. And I’m so grateful that it did. A mixture of turmeric paste on the shingles & Epsom Salt baths worked miracles so that my body could deeply clear out what was ‘out of date’.
Many people have lovingly said ‘oh poor you, I’m so sorry’ etc. & yet I see it in such a different way. I’m so grateful that in being able to look at the truths of my patterns & beliefs, I’m energetically coming into a greater harmony within my-self rather than being dis-jointed & compartmentalized. Thanks to this my body felt ready & safe to do it’s own harmonizing. This toxicity has been residing & building up in my body for many years & was absolutely ready to make its way to freedom & so was I.
Yes it was Christmas & yes I had plans to see friends & yet I experienced such deep, simple contentment doing jigsaw puzzles, drinking herbal tea & listening to Christmas songs. I occasionally had moments of thinking “oh, maybe I should be feeling stressed & running around like crazy doing the Christmas thing”, but these only came up when I tapped into what the radio presenters were saying. Things like, “Are you all exhausted from the Christmas shopping yet?”. “I hope you’re not feeling too stressed from all the running around”. “Are you sure you’ve got everything you need?” etc. Witnessing those “I should’s”, I then asked myself how I felt & I really did feel content where I was, doing what I was doing. I felt no desire or guilt to ‘Be’ in any other way. I knew that I was honouring my-self & the process that my body was going through. If I didn’t let it happen then, it would surely pop up at another time & knowing that I’m off to Zambia in the spring, it felt wise to relax into it right there & then.
It can be tricky at first to step aside from ‘the norm’ & to let it steam on ahead & yet after a while the choice to do anything else just isn’t there. It’s almost as though to get back into ‘the norm’ would take such pushing against everything that feels good, it would leave one absolutely drained & discombobulated (I love that word). The image I have is of an invisible force field that allows us, supports us & kind of carries us along into a realm of harmony – like being in clear jelly but if one was to turn around to try & go back, they’d see it was foggy & like walking in a wind tunnel. All the force would be against us because we’d be trying to go back into an unnatural way of being. The analogy of walking upstream of course is perfect. Just imagining it makes me hold my breath.
As Christmas was approaching, the most important thing for me was to connect with my family.
We are in various parts of the world & don’t see each other often & connecting with them felt more important than anything else. It was so beautiful & I was so grateful. Seeing their smiling faces, celebrating Christmas in their unique ways, sharing their stories & sharing our love. That was the greatest gift & one that lasts forever. Tears of deep, deep gratitude & connection fall down my cheeks.
I wish you all moments within moments of magic, awe & wonder, love, peace & lots of fun in an ever more connected way. I love you all.